A Very Serious Story About Life & Love (Ch 1)
by TonotoKing
Summary: What the title says. Enjoy, Soviet Crab's page: /u/7149288/Soviet-Crab


Chapter 1

By TonotoBro, Soviet Crab, and Shiroe

It was a rainy, wet day.

I was wearing a grey jacket and dark blue jeans.

I was running along the boardwalk, trying to get under some shade.

I saw a bright yellow porch and I hurried under, hoping to find some cover.

Then I saw her.

My heart stopped inside my chest as I saw the most amazing girl I had ever seen.

She said, "Well hello?

What are you doing under my porch?

My mom said I'm not allowed to flirt with boys anymore."

All of a sudden, John Cena challenged me.

I thought, who would dare challenge my unrequited love?!

My primal instincts kicked in as I lunged at him.

Then I exploded into a wall of pure muscle.

Then John Cena turned into Lucifer and ate Daniel Chong, some pleb

With one well tone kick, he sent brian tumbling into the streets

the girl came running to him

she said, "are u okay?"

"My name is Nikki." What's yours?

then John Cena challenged Brian

then Brian exploded into a wall of pure muscle again

then John Cena challenged Brian

and Brian ate some shrooms

and ate John Cena

then Nikki went like: (boom *naruto harem no justsu)

then Brian got distracted and was slammed into a wall

John Cena then self destructed

Nikki took brian inside and took care of him later.

Brian regained consciousness on a soft. white bed

the room was filled with pictures of Got7

Brian said ugh

what is this junk

then Nikki walked in and said."You look better then all of them."

Brian pulled multiple selfies of himself out of his pockets and gave it to nikki

Nikki was so happy that she turned into John Cage

John Cage approved Obama to legalize gay weed which caused Donald Trump to send TrumpCare to Pluto

TrumpCare forced everyone to get Brian selfies or else they will be Brianified

Trump made Brian realize that he was a casanova and he started to give out selfies to everyone for $4,209./11

Nobody bought them so he decided to make Obama the new president

"Obama will make everyone buy my selfies," said Brian.

Brian assassinated Trump and gave Obama the deed of handing out selfies.

Obama did not do that.

Obama had a secret alliance with KIm Jong Un and he kept supplying Twinkies to KIm

Kim then nuked Brian with truckloads of twinkies

Then, there was a noise in the bathroom

AND THE GLORIOUS FUHRER WAS RESURRECTED IN THE TOILET and then

CHAOS ENSUED

Sadly, Hitler had the gun in his mouth and accidently pulled the trigger

He died again

Then he became a HITLER ZOMBIE!

Kim Jong Un made a secret pact with the company that made Pizza, and ordered all the pizza

in the world.

But little did they know, the Hitler Zombie infected all of the pizza.

This made everyone die of hunger.

Brian thought that he should save everyone.

Using the money he got from the Mexican mobster El Chapo for assassinating Trump, he made the Avengers that contained his best friends

Samuel was the annoying guy who shoots paper arrows

Tom was the one who used his powers of lard to kill everyone around by sitting on them

Hitler was a dead guy (but he was zombo too)

Mr. Stava was the one who had a suit made of lego

Ethan was the guy who had a shield made out of PURE STALINIUM and rode in much stronk tonk

Nicholas Cage was the guy who had a hammer made of BEES BEES BEES, and THREW GLORIOUS BEE CAGES

And finally, Brian wore a black jump suit because he can

They named themselves

THE NEINVENGERS

Before they were able to save the whole world, the Neinvengers had to save the denizens of Kim City

Kim City was a dangerous place full of Twinkie-bots

Samuel shreked them with the divine might of allahu ackbar and they all died

Then they met a citizen of the Kim City

"Help! Kim Jong Un is making us spawn more and more Hitlers in our toilets!" cried the man

"I don't even like bloody pudding…" said the man

The Neinvengers destroyed the city, freeing the citizens but the Hitlers were nowhere to be found

"I don't like the feeling of this" said Tom

Next, they traveled to the lost path of the yellow brick path.

Soon they Neinvengers found the Megan Woods

The Neinvengers traveled through the Megan Woods where they spotted the ancient Megan

The Megan trampled through the woods, never losing sight of the Neinvengers.

Samuel tried to shoot the Megan with paper arrows but it failed.

Tom tried to sit on the Megan but he got knocked out by the Megan's cursing

Hitler just died again

Nicolas Cage threw bees at the Megan

Mr. Stava fainted from heat exhaustion

Ethan bonked the Megan with POORE STALINIUM but the Megan ate it

Then Brian threw bottle rockets at the Megan and she died

Then they met another enemy.

They were the CHONG BEES  
Nicolas Cage tried to stop the bees with his Bee Cages, but he failed and got dedded on

Luckily, Hitler revived him with what was left of his non-existent soul

Brian then remembered something

"Use this if you need too," said Nikki.

Brian drew a bunch of figures on the ground

NIKKI FREAKING TELEPORTED UP FROM THE GROUND KUNG LAO STYLE

She helped to kill the Chong Bees and they were all gone

After fighting through waves of Chong Bees, they found themselves facing the final boss

One they never expected...

The Glorious Leader Himself, KIM JONG UUUUUUN!

But something seemed wrong…

UHHRUUU NUUUU HE'S KIM JONG ZOMBIE

The infected pizzas got to him, it seems that even the Glorious Leader couldn't survive them.

As The God rose up, anyone from miles around could hear his war cry:

"KIM JONG UN DICTATES THE PAIN!"

Tips for Aspiring Fascists:

How to resurrect Hitler in your toilet

1\. Chant Hitler 5 times in the bathroom

2\. Eat some fookin bloody pudding

3\. Go into the restroom and take a dump

Pro Tip: You can spawn more than one Hitler

(Chapter 1 END)

Author's Note:

Yo people! I am TonotoKing, King of all Tonotos and this piece of art is my FIRST fanfic. I decided to do one with my fellow friends By Soviet Crab, and Shiroe and we decided that me and Crab take turns posting a chapter! So leave a review if you want and go check out the second chapter!

 **TONOTOKING APPROVES OF THIS MESSAGE**

Go see Chapter 2 at Soviet Crab's page!

Link: s/11519810/1/A-Very-Serious-Story-About-Life-Love-Ch-2

Or just search up **A Very Serious Story About Life Love**


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